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…from Chapter 17: My First Slow Dance

Excerpt from my book, Racing With My ShadowSteve Cauthen and me

Steve Cauthen and Me

Steve Cauthen was coming to the Meadowlands! The star jockey had moved to England just before I rode my first race. This would be his first visit back to ride in the United States.

I couldn’t wait! I was so excited at the thought of finally getting to ride with my idol. The press was out for this momentous sports occasion. They took a quick picture of the two of us.

As I stood nervously by my hero, I proudly reminded him that we had done a Trident commercial together. Did he remember? He said he did, although I don’t know if he was just trying to be nice to me.

After the last race there was a big party to celebrate his appearance. All the jockeys were invited.

I showered and changed, wondering if I would fit in. I was on unfamiliar territory without my boots and helmet. Would Steve notice me without my jockey silks?

At the party, I was talking to someone from the press when I saw that…Steve…had come into the room. My thoughts drifted as I watched him.

I hope he noticed that I rode two winners. Steve was talking to several people, making his way slowly over to where I was standing.

I tried to be cool and casual, but my heart was beating so fast. My palms were sweating as he came over and started talking to me.

All I could see was his grin. I had seen him in those pictures back on the farm and had wanted to be just like him…just like Steve…just like Steve….

What was he saying? He was saying something. And smiling. Nice smile, so genuine. What? He took my hand, and I floated away. Where was he taking me? I didn’t care…

The next thing I knew we were on the dance floor. It was then that I realized I didn’t know how to dance.  What was I doing? I didn’t expect this…

I had never danced with anyone before. Dance? Slow dance??? My heart was beating so fast, the music was so slow, too slow. What was I doing?

Steve knew how to dance? I knew he could ride… I could ride…but…whoever thought about learning to dance? This is not the time to learn. I don’t know how to dance and I’m dancing with Steve Cauthen!!!

I’ll fake it. What do I have to lose? I’m going to die of a heart attack anyway. Ugh. Why hadn’t I ever done this before? Don’t step on his feet. Concentrate. I can’t. I can’t do this.

“Um,” a strange voice stammered out of me. “I’ve never done this before. I’m sorry. I can’t. I really can’t.”

Steve reassured me that I was doing fine. I was?

He slowed down and told me not to worry, that I didn’t even have to follow his steps! I was so close to him that I went numb. I thought I was going to die. I was so nervous.

Steve talked to me as we moved across the floor. He spoke to me, and gradually I forgot to be nervous. I forgot that we were supposed to be dancing.

I didn’t notice that everyone was watching us; I was absorbed in him. No longer did I think about where to put my clumsy feet. They had already been there, and back again, to the music.

Then it was over. The dance had ended. Why did it have to end so soon? I loved to dance! I walked away, feeling as though I was waking up from a dream.

I will never forget my first slow dance. No, not as long as I live.

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